Okay, let me break down this matter of whether family should come first or if we should prioritize ourselves. Thanks to the ladies of hive community for this topic and so guess everyone should know this, even though it is my own perspective
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To be sincere, it's a really tricky balance. As someone with passion and ambition, it's very easy to just put ourselves and our personal goals first before anything else. After all, it's our life and hustle, so why shouldn't we make it the number one priority?
But at the same time, family is not something we should treat casually either. As Africans, this is one of our core values that we've held tightly from the days of our ancestors. Family is sacred, the foundation upon which we build everything else.
For me personally, I wholeheartedly believe that family must certainly come first. They are my roots, my source, the ones who will be there for me no matter what. Even if I'm inclined to prioritize just myself, that kind of mindset doesn't sit well in my spirit at all.
You see, this life is not just about chasing money, fame or success alone. It has a deeper meaning that connects to who we are as human beings. Our family bonds, traditions and values are what give us a sense of identity and purpose beyond just individual achievements.
Anytime I'm faced with any serious life decision, the first thing I consider is how it will impact my family members - my husband ,my children, my parents, my brothers and sisters. If it won't favor them well, then that means I need to rethink it very carefully.
At the end of the day, what's the point of succeeding as an individual but messing up or neglecting the family ties that define our existence as human beings? We are not robots, we have souls and spirits that need nurturing through strong family bonds and cultural roots.
I know some people will argue that we should cut family off if they are just holding us back from achieving our full potential. But please, only a child would think that way. That's a lack of wisdom.
You see, a real family will never hold you back if they truly have your best interests at heart. Instead, they will support and motivate you to achieve your dreams as long as it doesn't go against your values and principles as a person.
It's only bad and toxic people who will tell you to prioritize just yourself over your family duties and responsibilities. They don't understand that we operate from a different value system as Africans, one which puts family at the center of who we are.
At the same time, this doesn't mean I don't recognize the importance of self-prioritization too. Of course, I need to focus on my personal goals, growth and well-being to really stay balanced and show up fully for my family too.
If I neglect or sacrifice myself too much for other people's sake, how can I operate at my best level? We have to be strategic about it, find the balance that allows us to achieve our dreams while keeping family bonds strong too.
It takes two wings for a bird to fly, doesn't it? We need family and self working in harmony, not one overshadowing the other. Prioritize self for some aspects, prioritize family for other aspects - that's how balance is achieved.
For example, I can dedicate intense focus and energy to my career hustle and securing the bag. But anytime a family matter comes up, I'll pause and shift my priorities to handle what concerns us as a unit.
If my husband or childreb needs me, I'll drop anything I'm doing to be there for them, won't you agree? That's a family responsibility I'll never take for granted or put second to anything else.
Another key thing is that we need to take time nurturing our family bonds and traditions too. It's not just about focusing on the individual rat race, forgetting where we came from and the importance of passing down our heritage to future generations.
Making family a priority means actively investing in those connections - having regular family gatherings, upholding our cultural practices, imparting vital wisdom and life lessons to the young ones. That's what truly roots us and gives substance to who we are.
So in summary, for me the balance requires prioritizing myself to achieve my personal visions and be the best version of myself. But that self-actualization journey must be firmly anchored by an unwavering commitment to keeping family at the center too. One wing cannot fly without the other.
Family made me who I am, it's my foundation and refuge in this often challenging world. So while I am indeed my own top priority in terms of self-development, growth and ambition, my family will always be my number one priority in the bigger picture of my life's purpose and lasting legacy.
We are Africans. Individualism is important, but family reigns supreme as the core pillar that defines our strength, identity and humanity. I'm just honoring that divine truth by ensuring family always comes first for me. That's on period.
