A fatal reaction to ...

The anesthesia that almost took me all at once to the blue apartment, better called by me, (Heavenly Eden).

I selected the photo on the beach, to publish this post, because that's what I was thinking about while I was praying to God, and relaxing, when I felt that my life was very fragile.

A few years later, I thank God that I am still here, standing and at His service. With good and not so good moments between changes and recovery, and new lifestyle.

After this experience ...

The best thing about the process is being the first thing on the list, adding a lot of self-love. To say things, to keep nothing. Putting distance where I don't feel comfortable and finally releasing judgment to others, especially those who like to talk about me behind my back.

We spent a lot of time busy on this.

And we conclude that always, whoever sees us from the sidewalk in front, will speak without knowing. They will criticize everywhere. The people we pretend to be good, we end up being the victims that we have put aside the responsibility. It's easy to sit around complaining, judging, criticizing and the endless cycle.

It's not up to us to judge, or to carry on the war on the keyboard. For God's sake!!! Let's be happy, let's be one, I no longer stop them, nor pay attention to those who are behind me.

I have also become an observer of the fact that few fulfills that, that "let the one who is free from sin cast the first stone" , because I continue to see how little attention humanity pays to this historical phrase.

Today, even without a uterus, or ovaries, because I had a total hysterectomy, I am still developing projects, I open my arms to accompany my children in their life projects and those who want to take shelter in them as children, too.

This year has not been an easy year, everything is cyclical, and we are barely in July. It hasn't been. Sooner or later. Everything turns around. We learn that life follows a constant cycle.

There is no definitive end, only new opportunities to start over. Every ending is just the beginning of something else.

So, does it feel like an end, or do you dream of an end?, I remember that when I felt that it was the end, I recovered, I left the ICU, and today I can tell you, that it was and is only a curve in the cycle of life.

Nothing has that end that we long for, because there is always a new dawn, opportunity, a new chapter to be written. I embrace change, flow with the cycle, and find beauty at every turn along the way. It has been a wise year and one of nourishing lessons for my daily life.

I imagine that my responsibility is that: to take care of myself. We prefer to "help" others excessively and forget about our responsibility to (us), this is the analogy of the rabbit and the tiger.

Without a perfect body, but with integral health, thanks to God and my self-care, which is nothing more than staying in a state of joy and grace.

It is part of my healthy self-esteem to think differently and maintain my opinions. Besides people won't put themselves in my shoes, so I can't do, whatever people please, including my family, I just do whatever makes me happy, gives me calm and serenity.

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PS: I'm not at the beach, but it's my most fervent wish.

Janitze.