Who Gets a Slice from the Pie

in Ladies of Hive3 days ago

Drawing a written Will or a legal document indicating who gets this or that is not normally practiced in our locality or my family. My grandparents (both sides) distributed their properties to their children while they were alive. Likewise, we have been given our share of our parents' assets sometime in the mid-2000s. My Dad gathered my siblings one day (I was abroad at that time), discussed the matter, and then passed on to them the legal documents (property titles and such). I have mine too, of course (it's not because I wasn't there that I'd be excluded).

So yes, we had our slices of the pie and they should be under our names by now but we kept postponing the processing of papers.


Anyways, the remaining properties not included in the distribution (family residence, monies, vehicle, a few lands, etc) are still at our parents' disposal and were not promised to any of us. But we do know from observation in the locality that the family home usually goes to the lastborn when both parents pass on (unless it's named to a certain person). Cash and other liquid assets are often used during the wake (at least 5 days) and interment, the costs of which are quite extravagant (some families have to sell properties to cover the expenses).

Joan's question this week got me seriously considering what I had jokingly asked my sister sometime last year when we had a conversation about health, death, and such. Without any children, to whom are we going to Will our assets? She has an answer - whoever takes good care of me and the Farmboy when we are old and weary.

Aha! That makes sense, yeah? LOL!

This reminded me of a time when an aunt passed away. Her children from her first marriage (she remarried after my uncle died) wanted to clear the matters regarding their original family's properties so they called for a meeting and I was there. The discussion turned ugly at some point so local officials had to intervene. Properties or riches can certainly cause rifts among family members. People's attitudes can change in an instant.

That, and other stories of family feuds regarding estates show that a written will is important because we want to save our relatives the headache when the time comes. My parents have done their part and it's time for us to do ours. One day soon, we will have to sit down and account for our worldly possessions (which are not substantial but growing) and start thinking about who to assign them to.

Until then, happy weekend!


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This is such an important topic.

Many families avoid discussing wills, consider it morbid even, but as you've pointed out, it can prevent unnecessary conflicts in the future.

I've also seen how disputes over inheritance can turn ugly, even among close relatives. And I would definitely not want that to be the case with me and my siblings.

It’s great that your parents handled things early, giving you all clarity. Estate planning may not be a priority when we're young, but it's something we all need to consider.

Hopefully, more people realize its importance before it’s too late. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this!

Yes, some even have superstitious beliefs that discussing it while they are alive is like fast-tracking their death. Hope we learn from the experiences of others and do what's necessary to avoid future conflicts in our families.

Thank you too for your insightful comment :)

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I think parents should do such an important task because if the thing leaves for the future generation, it will bring trouble for the next generation and conflicts may occur for it.
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Yes, it's a must-do to spare the descendants of problems when the time comes.

causes of family quarrels talaga.. lalo na dito sa pinas.. hayz.. same din dito sa amin, the youngest gets the house..hahaha pero lately, sinabi ni papa ko na since I am the only girl, i will get the house daw.. but baka magalit ung youngest namin so I ask him if taht's okay with him.. di naman sya ng say ng no..di din sya ng say ng yes hahaha

Same din pala sa inyo sis yung house sa youngest. Nag-iisip pa siguro yong brother mo kaya d sya maka yes or no, hehe 😅

heeheh un nga sis hehehe di pa sya makapagdecide..

Sinususpense ka sis, lol!

Estate Planning is a must. My dad passed away without a will and my uncle was terminally ill and there was a debate whether to create a will or transfer properties ASAP. Sometimes, it's after death that is harder.

It is indeed. Hope things were alright even when your Dad didn't leave a will. It gets difficult when one in the family wants everything or most for himself.

This is such a real world situation that needs to be put into practice.

I've seen so many family's broken because parents weren't responsible enough to leave a will clearly assigning something to someone...

Yes, it seems to happen in most places. It can be really ugly when not only immediate families get involved but also distant relatives.

Same with us sis, we don't have will, only verbal agreement on which goes to who. Or else the property would be divided to the children equally.😁.

Okay rin ang verbal agreement sis, pag nagkakaintindihan kayong lahat :)

Ha, ha! I hope I can get a micro-share from that pie :))

Joke aside, I think it's smart to put everything in order while you live and leave your people a pleasant gift, and not a pile of problems when you are done with this world.

Unfortunately, many forget to observe their own greed...

Take a slice, LOL!

It is one most people tend to neglect or postpone until it is too late. I do know some who for some reason refused to distribute their properties even when they were on their deathbeds, causing rifts among their families.

Family possessions could really cause a rift among family members. It’s happening in our family.

I hope you will settle it peacefully

It’s important to make a proper will before one dies
This way, there will be no fight or quarrels amongst family members about properties…

Yes, while things may seem okay, we never know what happens when the time comes.

Certainly this issue of property and inheritance brings problems, it is a reason to leave everything in writing in a will, for peace of mind, thank you for sharing your experiences my friend,
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Sometimes, we have to see things happen before we realize the importance of keeping things in order. Thank you too, for your input :)

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Parents who make sacrifices for their children and explain everything to them that times are tough and things have to be handled with more care if a good life is to be had.

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