Breaking Point: Overcoming Fear

in Hive Learners7 months ago

Many people who know me through engagement on Hive, discord, and in real life might find what I’m about to say a bit difficult to believe, but it is what it is. I’m about to share one of my biggest fears with you all and the funny way in which I was able to overcome it.

Back in secondary school, I really didn’t know the issue I had with the ladies, probably because I was ugly or I didn’t have a good sense of dressing. The girls in my class all hated me; sometimes I feel like all the girls in school do, and my biggest fear was talking to a lady and getting into trouble. I can say that throughout my high school days, I can count how many times I spoke with the ladies in my school. Especially the girls in my class; they avoided me, and I avoided them.

Maybe it was because of the way I snap my pictures 😫

One day, my class teacher made sure a boy and a girl shared the same desk, meaning you couldn’t sit with your favourite person again, so I peered at the hottest girl in my class. She always complained about how I looked, how I smelled, the clothes I wore, and many other things. The fear of going to school because I had to sit with her alway creep me every morning, I’m always scared when she wants to say something because I feel she will attack me. It was easier to have conversations with guys in my class and other classes than to have a conversation with one girl in the school.

The fear followed me to the university level. Sometimes, friends asked me how I never dated any girls in my high school days. I was glad I was able to avoid the girls because I was scared of them.

Actually, there was only one girl I ever liked, and she lived down my street. I didn’t ask her out because I was scared of what she might say. I wasn’t even at the university, so she became my muse to put forward. When I got to the university, I felt it was the right time to have a girlfriend, so I proceeded to ask her out during our semester break.

Well, it didn’t turn out well. I got insulted, looked down upon, and washed. I felt sick for two weeks, but thanks to that, the fear of talking to ladies left me that day. I had always loved her, and I felt she would be different, but that day, I felt like Adam when he ate the forbidden fruit. After I recovered from my sickness, I promised to be the guy all ladies would sort after. Not because I want to have anything to do with them but because I want to improve myself.

I started talking to ladies randomly, in church, bus, market, mall, everywhere I find myself, and just like that, I stopped becoming scared of ladies. Now, I have so many ladies friends that my male friends do ask me to link them up with each other so they can start something. I’m Fash; I might not be perfect, but I’m better than what I used to be, and I’m working towards becoming the best version of myself.

DSC_0137 - Copy_Original.jpeg

These are all old pictures, I bet the 2023 and 2024 own will blow your mind, maybe those picture will be story for another day. Thanks for reading.

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No matter how small or big the fear is, I strongly believe it can actually be overcome

I feel your pain @fashtioluwa. Though not as bad as yours, but I was never into girls during my high school days. I was an outspoken person though but I never asked any girl out. I was friend with the whole girls in the class but our friendship was never anything more that casual. I can remember the first day I hanged my hand on a girl's shoulder, the whole of class mate laughed like never before. I was like the reverend father of the class, and you can imagine

😂😂😂
Ok ok
Now I understand why the class laughed

Well, it was never my thing to seek their attention too

That day was not funny😀

wow fash. you are lowkey flexing lol or are u a womanizer O.O

I don’t even talk to them again 😫😫😫

They become so much I started avoiding them

become so much meaning? they want your money O.O

something like that which is why I keep running away from them

wow girls can earn themselves now we are past those times

Some are lazy and don’t wanna

o.o then u should mirror them lol then they will ignore u

Doing that successfully already 😁😁👍👍

Everyone must experience fear in their life, but they must have a way out of fear, thank you for sharing friends..

Thanks for reading too

Youre welcome brother

I think most of us face problems in conversation with girls. You are grown up handsome bro. You are crush of many I believe.

😅😅
Yeah, I turned out to be a handsome guy and it’s time for me not to answer all the girls running after me

Haha it's true I appreciate you for that my bro

This pictures want to make me call you "big daddy" but I will reserve my comment. Hahahaha. So many guys have this fear of approaching ladies due to so many reasons.

But I'm glad what happened occured for you to step up your game and improve on yourself and become that guy every lady wants to associate with. I must say, the approach you took in tackling your fear was one of the best. Engaging yourself in conversation more with the opposite sex.

Thanks for the comment. It was the only way I believe I could over come my fear which was what made me use that approach. At first I was so poor in communication but now. Hehehehehhe
Ok ok
I accept the title of big daddy

Thanks for the comment. It was the only way I believe I could over come my fear which was what made me use that approach.

Sharp, tht was a nice approach I must say. I'm glad it worked and you improved in your communication skill.

Hehehehehhe
Ok ok
I accept the title of big daddy.

Signed and acknowledged with immediate effect. Hahahah.

😂😂😂❤️❤️❤️🫶🏽🫶🏽

Wow!!!

And you indeed proved yourself right by snapping with all these ladies. How amazing that is!

Hehehe
Don’t mind me. I was showing of the result after I over came my fear 😅

😂 That is indeed an achievement.

So now that you have confidence around ladies have you ever wondered why you were scared of them all those times?

They were just bullies when I was little. thats all. I had many bad experiences with ladies as a kid in school. One of my classmates once walked up to me and said, "I hate you; I don't know why; I just hate you. Try and die so we can all rest."

Her name was Bolaji, but here I am today. I dont even like remembering my past self

OMG!!

That was so mean of her. People do indeed speak without thinking twice.

Do you still know anything about her currently?

I dont even know anything about her and I dont even want to know

Okay. It's good to know you're doing just perfect now.

Why now 😂 show me the 2023/2024 pictures. That's not fair 😂

So, it happens, but I liked the way you just faced it. All die na die, something must kill a man and if it doesn't, it makes him stronger
That girl my be looking for ways to talk to you now you know 😂

Hehehe
All die na die o

I was like, I don’t care if I get insulted over and over but I must over come this fear
For that lady. She’s now in the friend zone even tho she wanted something to happen some year back but me too do shakara and say

I wish I had same feeling like I use to back them but I see you same way I see other ladies.
😤😤

Not too harsh tho

😂😂😂😂
That's good

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