Waking up for UFC: A monthly ritual that ensures bad Mondays

If you follow my stuff you know that I have been making efforts to curb my drinking because I am a borderline alcoholic. This is quite common in the expat community around the world because due to I think language difficulties and the fact that most expat activities revolve around drinking, almost anything you do is going to involve copious amounts of booze.

I have a rule now that I do not go out for a proper drinking session unless there is some sort of even or reason for me to do so. Weekends are irrelevant to me because I am just as likely to have a Tuesday off work as I am a Saturday. In fact, I will often schedule my heavier workloads on the weekends in an effort to curb my drinking. There aren't many people in this expat community that actually do value weekends because most of us hang out with mostly other expats and most of the expats either do not have jobs or they have jobs that don't include any sort of pre-sent Sat/Sun weekend. The only exception would be the school teachers who teach at physical schools or the odd person here or there that has an actual professional job. I only know a single person that falls into the latter category.

But there is one event that is guaranteed once a month and that is when there is a UFC event on. I am not a huge fan of UFC but since I am not really into the sports that are really popular here such as rugby, AFL, and English football, I don't often participate in the sports bar scene. I do like bloodbaths and was a fan of boxing when I was a teenager so I wake up early to start drinking one Sunday a month when UFC is on.

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This UFC will be a special one because it is taking place in that new Las Vegas thing that you see online called "The Sphere" I think it is called. Well, that is the reason why it will be special for true fans perhaps. Locally, it is special because the Irish pub / sports bar that we go to for these events is rolling out their breakfast menu for the first time ever today and I will get my first try of something I was unaware was a thing, and "Irish Breakfast." Now I am really hoping that this isn't a piss-take and that you get some eggs served with whiskey or something disgusting like that.

I already know how the morning is going to pan out for me. I drink VERY FAST when I drink at all and it makes no difference to me if this is in the morning, afternoon, or night. The reason why I almost never drink until the wee hours like a lot of my friends do is because I always drink beers as if someone was going to take it away from me if I don't drink it quickly. I will normally drink 3 beers for each 1 that a friend has and someone will always comment about how fast I am consuming. I don't do this to show off, it is just something that became a part of how I am as a person in the past 10 years or so. This is another reason why there normally isn't such a thing as going out for "a few drinks" with me. I know myself, and I know that if I do not adhere to a plan such as having 3 and then getting some food and heading home, that I will not stick to the plan.

Thankfully, my dog Nadi comes in very handy for exactly these sorts of situations: She is my insurance policy in a way.

Since I care more about her well-being than I do even my own, I will notice when she is getting tired and wants to go home, which will definitely happen after the enthusiasm wears off in a couple hours and she is just sleeping on a bar stool in the bar. I will allow her on the floor every now and then but since she is small and people in pubs aren't generally looking where they are walking, she stands a great chance of getting stepped on. Therefore, it is wise to put her on the stool and she will frequently look over the bar if there is any food going on over there.

When Nadi is with me I always have my "out." If someone tries to give me shit for "going home early" I can always blame it on the dog even though in reality I have had my fill and think it would be wise for me to head back to the house and get off the booze. I know myself though and what is likely to happen today is that I am going to drink for the entire 3 hours that UFC is on, then probably have a few more after it is over. Then I will need to go home and try my best to be a good boy and not allow this to turn into an all day affair. I am not one for napping, so perhaps you can understand how difficult it can be to get drunk by 1pm and then find something else to do that doesn't involve booze for the rest of the day. Without fail, Mondays are always a terrible experience and this is where my only other addiction kicks in. There is this drug that you need a prescription for in USA and most places called Tramadol, which is a synthetic opiate and you can just buy it because you feel like it at pharmacies here. If you take two of those you will not be hungover anymore. This isn't a healthy move at all but it does the trick and I only use it on occasions such as being horribly hungover on a Monday morning and being forced to leave my condo because that is when the cleaners come by.

Well anyway. Cheers to all you degenerates out there that have rituals like my own that takes place at an inappropriate time of day to drink!