Broken Wings

in Reflections5 months ago

My wife went out for a walk with her sister for a few hours, and Smallsteps and I stayed at home, pottering about, playing some games and then with the camera in the garden. She gave me a tour of the flowers, naming each one in turn, then correcting herself if she had the wrong name. Her grandmother has taught her most of this, sending her pressed flowers every summer in the post with the name of it under plastic contact. Some grandparents are great.

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However, the flowers aside, what we also did was "analyze" song lyrics to try and work out what the meaning might be behind parts of it. This isn't an exercise in actually knowing what it is, it is about helping Smallsteps understand metaphors better, especially in English. It is a challenge to teach metaphorical speech in English naturally, when I am about the only one who speaks with her in English often, and my speech isn't very rich these days.

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We analyzed "Blackbird" by the Beatles, as she has just learned all the lyrics and is enjoying singing it. She has liked the Beatles since she was a toddler, so she knows many of the songs, but not all of the lyrics. But, especially since she has started playing the piano this year, she is more keen on understanding different parts of the music. She is doing pretty well.

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Now, as said, this isn't about being correct, it is about laterally thinking through the words and working out what other meanings it might have. We talked each line through, and settled on a person who felt that they weren't good enough, that they were sad and didn't feel they could reach their potential. But, realized that even though they were broken, that they were different, they could still learn to be great, not caring about what others thought of them.

She was happy.

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After she went to bed, I looked into what MacCartney was actually writing about, and we were not even close, but also not entirely wrong. It is about the civil rights movement in the US, and in particular, the Little Rock Nine in Arkansas. One day I will tell her more about racism, but it is not the time yet - she will likely be introduced to it soon enough, as a half Finnish kid.

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These "games" that we play are a lot of fun, and she really gets into them, as she tries to workout meanings, or how to explain things that she doesn't fully understand, or just add new words into her vocabulary. A lot of what we do is educational in some way, but it also leads to heaps of great conversations and laughs, and none of it feels like a lesson. If anything, it feels like an "adult" conversation.

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The other day I was introduced to a friend of a friend, and she was talking about her kids and asked if we had seen the latest about what happened on "Bluey". She was shocked that I had never seen it and was almost judgmental that I "deprived" my daughter of the experience. It was kind of funny, because my friend then said,

"Smallsteps (using her real name) doesn't watch much TV, does she? We are planning to do the same with ours."

It often feels these days that many parents don't have time for their kids. Or perhaps they feel that their kids don't need them as much, because they aren't demanding their attention when they are sitting on a screen. Whatever it is, I don't think Smallsteps is being deprived, and I don't think that she is missing out on experience. Quite the opposite. She gets to listen to good music, have rich discussions, and get plenty of time with us for hugs and kisses, whenever she wants and needs.

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She might be the last one standing. But I hope not. I think that the tide might be turning in the minds of some, especially as more research comes out about the harm that we have done to children by sticking them in front of screens too early. For many, the damage might be done and irreparable.

Hopefully they can still fly with broken wings.

Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]

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I couldn't agree with you more. The screens are hypnotic subverters that act on young and old alike. For the young minds it is way too easy to be swayed one way or another and the 'programmers' are fully aware of the power they hold. I think it's great to limit Smallsteps' screen time and more importantly, to get the face to face interaction that is central to humans. It sometimes feels as though we are all turning into machines.

I wonder what they are going to discover in terms of developmental problems in the future. The first few years are critical for brain development, and there are studies about what happens when kids don't have enough interpersonal communication, yet we are putting them on screens before they are one.

That's cool that you do stuff like that with her. I can't really speak to much of this because I don't have kids. It is sad to see so many people take the easy way out when it comes to entertaining them.

It is a lot of fun. One of my friends plays different games with her too when he visits, and teaches her stuff. He is from the US, so it is good language support - even if the accent is bad ;D

Oh wow, that is cool.

I've said to you (and several others) at least once before, it doesn't matter what you do with the parenting gig, it will always be completely wrong (for no other reason than that's not how someone else would have done it/thinks it should be done and they are of course right which means there's no other option but for you to be wrong, none of this whatever works in a situation nonsense) xD

I get it!

I am ready for her to scream at me about her upbringing, whilst driving her luxury car home, from the job that she loves doing.

:D

I hope that's what she grows up to XD

Though hopefully rather than yelling at you about her upbrinnging she'll be more like my eldest and telling you that she thinks you and wifey did a great job with what you knew/had at the time and she's glad you did things the way that she did, perhaps with what she thinks you could have done differently XD

When we were kids, we didn't watch a lot of TV. We played a lot as siblings, and with our toys. Seeing how a lot of kids these days seem to have short attention span and have difficulty staying still, I think too much screen time is bad. With that being said, of the shows that we watched when we were kids, we still remember them fondly and helped shape our childhood. Shows like Xmen and Pokemon [I still remember the opening songs] helped me make friends, have conversations with other kids, and really developed my imagination. Like in a lot of things, moderation is key.

Were the shows steaming when you were a kid. I think that this also impacts children a lot these days. They are never "bored" in the way they have to find something to do, make a game, get up to mischief. There is always something to watch - even if it has no value.

It was at the same time every day on the weekdays. That is why it was such a big thing, and we were excited when it was getting close to the time it airs. I think never 'bored' isn't a bad thing. Whenever we got bored, we just played with toys. I think the shows itself, with the bright visuals, and constantly changing images affect the attention span of the kids today.

The true value of a father is revealed in the time he invests in his family, it is a constant act of guiding with love, consideration and respect teaching our children to walk on the right path, even with broken wings, Mr.Taraz.

I think the role of the father is being degraded socially, but it might have never been more important than it is now.

Mr. Taraz a present father like you, you are the ones who build an unbreakable legacy with their children.

I think that the tide might be turning in the minds of some, especially as more research comes out about the harm that we have done to children by sticking them in front of screens too early.

It's dismal that most young people nowadays are attached to screens, even at an early age. I think it's the change in parenting strategy that made these changes; parents nowadays are too dependent on technology. Technology became their way to kinda escape their responsibility—I mean, one of their responsibilities is to teach their children, and now, most of them rely on it to teach their children stuff that they, as parents, should have taught their children personally.

I've seen the effect of excessive time spent in front of screens, and unfortunately, it's from my cousins. Due to it, they're really unable to relate well to the kids around their age. They thought that everything on screen was the same as what's in the real world, but unfortunately it wasn't. They grew up far from us, so when they transfer here to our place, they seem to be struggling to grasp the ways in which they interact normally with other kids. It's indeed an unfortunate thing, but hopefully I know they'll somehow improve.

Technology became their way to kinda escape their responsibility

But still expect that their kids will end up making good decisions in life.

It is interesting that both you and your brother used flowers as photos for your newest posts. It almost seems like you had an agreement about it.

lol - did we? Perhaps we have telepathy!

Screens and the internet increase knowledge and intellectual intelligence. Games and time together increase emotional and social intelligence. Each is needed to some degree, and lack of either has consequences. But some parents go more in one direction only.

Screens and the internet increase knowledge and intellectual intelligence.

Not so sure about this - it is too sweeping. A library is full of books, but if you only read the newspapers there...

More like acquiring knowledge versus understanding emotions.

I wonder what kind of differences she faces when talking with her peers who watch TV, play with smartphone and tablet.

They sing songs she doesn't know (from cartoons) and reference shows. However, so far, nothing major in their conversations together. But it seems that there is between the parents and the children.

However, the flowers aside, what we also did was "analyze" song lyrics to try and work out what the meaning might be behind parts of it. This isn't an exercise in actually knowing what it is, it is about helping Smallsteps understand metaphors better, especially in English. It is a challenge to teach metaphorical speech in English naturally, when I am about the only one who speaks with her in English often, and my speech isn't very rich these days.

Dear @tarazkp !

Does Miss. Smallsteps speak better English or Finnish?

Finnish. 90% of her life is in Finnish - she only speaks English at home and when I am in the room.

Wow
She has great grandparents for her to be thought all of those flower names and all
If you continue to help her learn lyrics, her English will be more better
Do a lot of Finnish people speak Finland language or more of English?

They speak Finnish here of course. But most have learned English well these days.

Now, as said, this isn't about being correct, it is about laterally thinking through the words and working out what other meanings it might have. We talked each line through and settled on a person who felt that they weren't good enough, that they were sad and didn't feel they could reach their potential. But, realized that even though they were broken, that they were different, they could still learn to be great, not caring about what others thought of them.

People are different in their ways and we also have different love stories to be told, I agree that we can learn from that differences and why cared about people thoughts as long that you understand you other half, at the end of the day the two of you is what matters the most.

Wow bro it's awesome how you help Smallsteps understand metaphors through song lyrics. Engaging in such activities will not only strengthen her language skills but also create a deeper emotional connection. These moments are truly precious and you're cool for doing this bro

You had a great time with Smallsteps. I’m glad about that and I’m very sure that she will have good memories of her childhood
I love the pictures of the flowers