I'm not sick ...

in Reflections18 days ago





I'm just pregnant.

This is a phrase (tremendously accurate, by the way) that I repeated to the point of exhaustion in the late 70s and 80s, pregnant with my children I let everyone know who crossed my personal path (including my husband), work and professional.

Nowadays, already being a grandmother I have heard it from some (moms) to avoid about protections that invalidate them, alienate them from their autonomy and segregate them, women who are on the defensive.

The phrase that usually follows this one is: "I can continue doing my life normally as I have always done it," and here I would say yes, but not everything is like that.

Yes, because a woman retains her right to decide autonomously about herself and her affairs. Yes, because there are many prohibitions frequent during pregnancy at all times (decades) that are absurd for example: sexuality, exercise and unpleasant feelings, such as crying.

Did they also tell you that it was bad to cry?, if you are pregnant.

I have been told that many times.

I still remember when I was pregnant, pregnant with my children, and even in this decade it happens, the mania of wanting to forbid us to "cry". If crying is human, it's natural, it's advisable and besides, we almost always feel better after having a good and copious cry 😭...😅

Not only did they not let me cry, but they also made me feel guilty if I did, telling me that I was going to hurt my baby if I kept crying like that; I also remember that during one of my three pregnancies two very important people died for me, so what I started doing was talking to my bb in my mother's womb, that I felt very sad, that that emotion was mine, that I needed to cry, that I was his mom, and he was my little bb, that I would take care of him continuing to grow healthy and strong with all my love, inside me.

Imagine those of you who read me, how little understanding they were with me, if a grief is always strong and when one is pregnant or postpartum it is even more so.

My husband and I manage this strategy of talking with our baby inside the tummy. My husband's support was infinitely valuable.

The same happens with anger and sadness, these emotions are necessary and accommodating them is essential to have peace, to function properly and not go through life pretending that everything is fine, when it is not so (social masks).

All emotions are necessary, if we suppress them we do not release the energy and the results of accumulating them are not encouraging at all for our mental and emotional health.

But pregnancy (and childbirth) is also a unique period for us women, in which portals to self-knowledge and bonding with the baby we bring on board, in our mother's womb, are opened to us, and this is not to romanticize pregnancy, there is a lot of scientific evidence about it that validates the obvious.

Photo of the memory, hahaha I pregnant belly dancing in the 80's. 💃

Therefore, it is a waste not to slow down the pace of life (even if it is the internal one), not to open the senses more than ever and prepare to live them with the greatest possible awareness, seeking and savoring every change, every experience and every learning. And you, how do you manage to find your rhythm of enjoyment?

Janitze.🌷❣️



Separator made with Canva by @janitzearratia


Any images in this post are taken with my iPhone 12, the Infinix pro-note 30 or with the camera eighties Rolleiflex 2.8 f, and edited by me with Canva


Translation with |DeepL